Diary of a Russian Wife

12/30/2006

Your Russian Wife Is American If...

I've found an interesting topic, "You Maybe Russified If".

In response, I've created my own list, "Your Russian Wife Is American If":

1. She asks her child a question in Russian and is not surprised that he/she answers in English.
2. She doesn’t dress up any more for grocery shopping.
3. She always remembers to fasten a seat-belt – even on a back seat.
4. She says “ooops” instead of “oy”.
5. She doesn’t immediately buy the fabulous piece of clothing that she liked, but waits until it’s on sale.
6. She reads the Internet news and forums more often than books.
7. She doesn’t tell jokes that are not politically correct.
8. She prefers jeans and tennis shoes to short skirts and high heals.
9. She believes that a gift card makes a good present.
10. She doesn’t spend 2 days in the kitchen before holidays and birthdays.
11. She throws out 90% of her mail without opening it.
12. She judges the size of a house by numbers of bedrooms in it.
13. She always remembers her social security number.
14. She suspects that "parking", "appointment", "OK", "shopping", "insurance" and "lunch" are Russian words.
15. She regularly orders iced tea in winter.
16. She buys fat-free food right after she has driven an additional 5 minutes around the parking lot to find a parking place three yards closer to the shop entrance.
17. She knows that 90 degrees Fahrenheit is hot and 30 degrees is cold.
18. She doesn’t know how to turn a TV on if a remote control is lost.
19. She uses her fingers to eat French fries.
20. When she stays in a hotel, those little soap bars don’t end up in her suitcase as souvenirs.
21. She thinks that 3 inches of snow is too much snow.

2 Comments:

  • My wife does about 14 of these things. If I would call her an American, wow watch out..

    By Blogger The Ranger, at 7:24 PM  

  • Well, this is scary. I am almost an American. Though no ice tea for me even in the summer time. So there is still some hope :) And I am even married to a Russian guy.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3:07 PM  

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